


My Brain is a Mess and Seventeen is too

by Mato_xx, Nyaw



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: But I still try as hard as I can to be funny, Canon Compliant, Chatting & Messaging, Comedy, Crack, I'm Sorry, M/M, Messy, My sense of humor is questionable at times, No Plot/Plotless, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Ships are subtle, Slow To Update, Social Media, Tags Are Fun, To relieve stress, What's new, basically a mess, i do this for fun, relationship tags will be added - Freeform, seventeen as seventeen
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-07-17
Updated: 2019-01-06
Packaged: 2019-06-11 22:36:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 7,185
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15325908
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mato_xx/pseuds/Mato_xx, https://archiveofourown.org/users/Nyaw/pseuds/Nyaw
Summary: Jeonghan: My son is such a smart boyDino: *manJeonghan: Drink your milk and sleepMingyu: LolDino changed Mingyu’s username to Shut UpShut Up: I just laughed???Dino: At something inappropriate to be laughed atorImagine a groupchat of daily Seventeen mess and multiply it by 17yea that's about it :)(Oh and they're still Seventeen here, cause we need more canon chatfic UwU)





	1. Shut Up, Wall God

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Usernames
> 
> S.Coups : S.Coups  
> Jeonghan : Jeonghan  
> Joshua : Joshua  
> Jun : Jun  
> Hoshi : Hoshi  
> Wonwoo : Wonwoo  
> Woozi : Woozi  
> DK : DK  
> Mingyu : Mingyu, Shut Up, Wall Head, Wall-Hit, Wall-Hitter, Wall-Hater, Wall H8-er (Mato i'm looking at you look at how many names this kid got)  
> The8 : The8, Dab8  
> Seungkwan : Seungkwan  
> Vernon : Vernon  
> Dino : Dino, The Wall God

**SEVENTEEN (13)**

 

**S.Coups**

Alright kids

 

**DK**

Hello hyung

 

**Woozi**

What is this shit

 

**S.Coups**

I haven’t even said anything wow

 

**Dino**

You said two words

 

**S.Coups**

I mean I said nothing rude

Like nothing bad enough to start a fight

 

**Dino**

Jihoon hyung didn’t even try to pick a fight with you

He cursed at you

They’re different, you know

 

**Jeonghan**

My son is such a smart boy

 

**Dino**

*man

 

**Jeonghan**

Drink your milk and sleep

 

**Mingyu**

Lol

  
  


_**Dino** changed **Mingyu** ’s username to **Shut Up** _

  
  


**Shut Up**

I just laughed???

 

**Dino**

At something inappropriate to be laughed at

 

**Hoshi**

HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA A BOY HA HA HA H AH AHAAHA AH AHA AHA HA

  
  


_**Dino** kicked **Hoshi** from the chatroom _

  
  


**Vernon**

Oof you don’t mess with Lee Chan

 

**Dino**

Thank you for stating that

 

**Seungkwan**

Yeah? You’re afraid to fight a baby? Man up, Vernon

  
  


_**Dino** kicked **Seungkwan** from the chatroom _

  
  


**Shut Up**

Chan is serious about this

It’s not impossible everyone would be kicked out of the chatroom

 

**Wonwoo**

No, if you’re not being impolite

 

**DK**

^

 

**Shut Up**

So you mean I did something impolite

I freaking LAUGHED

I only LAUGHED

Not even LITERALLY

IT WAS JUST AN ACRONYM

WAIT SEOKMIN NOT YOU TOO

 

**DK**

Well sorry Mingyu :(

 

**Wonwoo**

I mean you gotta be grateful, Soonyoung got kicked for laughing

You only got your name changed

Into a name fitting of your soul

Shut up, Shut Up

Thank you for giving him his name, Chan

 

**Dino**

You’re very welcome hyung

 

**Wonwoo**

I really love it when I see “Shut Up is typing…”

Thank you again for making my day, Chan

 

**Dino**

I’m glad I can make you happy hyung :)

 

**DK**

The good relationship between you two makes my heart soft :D

 

**Dino**

Aw Seokmin hyung :D

 

**DK**

:D

 

**Dino**

:D

 

**Shut Up**

Tf

 

**The8**

Hey Chan

 

**Dino**

Yes, hyung?

 

**The8**

You wanna know something interesting?

 

**Shut Up**

Myungho no

 

**The8**

Myungho yes

 

**Dino**

Spill, hyung

 

**The8**

Mingyu actually laughed after he read Jeonghan hyung’s message

Wait don’t kick him out just yet

He hit his head on the wall right after he said “Chan is a baby”

 

**Dino**

Hyung please pat the wall for me

It needs to know that it did a great job

The wall is my ally and they protect me from all forms of maliciousness directed towards me

  
  


_**Shut Up** changed **Dino** ’s username to **The Wall God** _

  
  


**The Wall God**

Wtf

 

**Shut Up**

You’re welcome

 

**Joshua**

What is this mess

 

**Shut Up**

Hi, hyung

 

**Joshua**

Who are you?

 

**The Wall God**

Guess! It’s one member of Seventeen who keeps on spitting out bullshits and makes absolutely no sense

 

**Joshua**

Language

Mingyu?

 

**The Wall God**

Sorry, hyung

Bingo

 

**Shut Up**

Dude hyung wtf

 

**The8**

LOL

 

**Woozi**

LOL

 

**The Wall God**

Even Shua hyung acknowledges

THE Joshua hyung

 

**Joshua**

I don’t mean to be rude but

Who are you too

 

**Jeonghan**

Our most loveable maknae, Joshua

Our baby Chan

 

**The Wall God**

Hyung please no stop that

 

**Joshua**

Oh...

 

**The8**

Fun fact

Mingyu hit his head again

 

**The Wall God**

Ah that calms me down a bit

Myungho hyung please pat the wall again

 

**The8**

On it

 

**Shut Up**

I can’t believe this

  
  


_**Wonwoo** changed **Shut Up** ’s username to **Wall Head** _

 

_**Woozi** changed **Wall Head** ’s username to **Wall-Hit** _

  
  


**Wonwoo**

Nice one, Jihoon

But what about… 

  
  


_**Wonwoo** changed **Wall-Hit** ’s username to **Wall-Hitter** _

  
  


**Woozi**

Brilliant, Wonwoo

 

**Wall-Hitter**

The heck I’m starting to hate the wall because of this

 

**Wonwoo**

You what.

Jihoon, did you see that?

 

**Woozi**

I saw that

DO IT WONWOO

  
  


_**Wonwoo** changed **Wall-Hitter** ’s name to **Wall-Hater** _

  
  


**Wall-Hater**

I hate you two

 

**Woozi**

I hate you too

Oh look! They rhyme :)

 

**Wonwoo**

I’m glad to know that

  
  


_**The8** changed **Wall-Hater** ’s name to **Wall H8-er** _

  
  


**The8**

Aaaaayeee

dabs

  
  


_**Wall H8-er** changed **The8** ’s name to **Dab8** _

  
  


**Dab8**

Thanks I love my name

 

**Wonwoo**

You know what, I kind of miss Shut Up

 

**The Wall God**

What

 

**Dab8**

What

 

**Woozi**

Wow Wonwoo that was pretty straightforward

 

**Wonwoo**

Um, no. You all misunderstood

I mean I miss the name “Shut Up” on Mingyu

 

**Wall H8-er**

Oh.

Well the name does sound better

 

**Wonwoo**

Would you like for the name to make a comeback?

 

**Wall H8-er**

No, thank you

I would like for my real name to come back

But WHO THE HEKC DEACTIVATED THE FEAUTRE TO RENAME YOURSELF IN THE GROUP

I DIDN’T EVEN KNOW YOU CAN DEACTIVATE THAT THING

I MEAN IT’S ONLY FAIR FOR PEOPLE TO NAME THEMSELVES

NO?

 

**Jeonghan**

But it’s fun, isn’t it?

At least your name still remains as Mingyu outside the group chatroom

 

**Wall H8-er**

HYUNG NO

WHY DID YOU DO THIS TO ME

 

**Jeonghan**

What do you mean… I did not deactivate it you know

I asked Seungcheol to do it since he’s the group admin

 

**Wall H8-er**

That’s…

Pretty much…

The same… 

 

**The Wall God**

Teasing Mingyu hyung is a lot of fun

 

**Woozi**

That comes from the maknae. Mingyu aren’t you embarrassed

 

**Jun**

Hi! What’s up?

 

**Vernon**

Hi Junhui hyung

They’re currently making fun of Mingyu hyung since he kept on hitting his head on the wall everytime Chan is being called a baby

Even by himself

 

**Dab8**

*keeps

There is more to come for sure, my friend

Our Wall-Hitter Wall H8-er will never stop hitting his head

It’s never-ending

 

**Vernon**

Oh ok cool

Yeah that’s pretty much the tea

 

**Wall H8-er**

WHAT IS UP WIHT THAT OK COOL

EVEN YOU HAVE BETREAYED ME ANSOL

 

**Vernon**

Uh I have been neutral from the very beginning

Like

I’ve never stated I’m on your side?

 

**Woozi**

OOOOOOOOOOOHHH

HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

 

**Wall H8-er**

I

 

**Jun**

Oh! Looks fun

 

**Wall H8-er**

Hyung not you too

 

**Jun**

Nah I’m not going to join that

But you know, being the baby of the group is a good thing, no?

 

**Wall H8-er**

  
  


**Woozi**

  
  


**Dab8**

  
  


**The Wall God**

What

 

**Jun**

What?

I mean that just means you’re cute?

And we all love and pamper you?

Since you’re our baby and stuff

And also it’s real though?

 

**Jeonghan**

As expected from Junhui… To always look at the positive side of everything

 

**S.Coups**

You all should learn from him… 

 

**The Wall God**

I

Have never thought about it that way

I’m seeing a new light

 

**Jeonghan**

So it’s okay for me to call you my baby now?

 

**The Wall God**

No I still refuse to be treated like a kid

But I do feel grateful for the love I received from the hyungs

 

**Jeonghan**

Awww

 

**S.Coups**

Awww

 

**Dab8**

Awww

 

**Wall H8-er**

Awww

 

**Jun**

Awww

 

**Joshua**

Um… I don’t want to ruin this beautiful atmosphere… 

But I was wondering why does this group only have 11 members… 

 

**The Wall God**

Oh my God I forgot completely about Hoshi hyung and Seungkwan hyung

  
  


_**The Wall God** invited **Hoshi** and **Seungkwan** into the chatroom **SEVENTEEN** _

 

_**Hoshi** joined the chatroom **SEVENTEEN** _

 

_**Seungkwan** joined the chatroom **SEVENTEEN** _

  
  


**The Wall God**

Hi hyungs :D <3

 

**Hoshi**

WHAT DID I DO WROG

 

**Woozi**

What the heck is wrog

 

**Hoshi**

I just joined the chatroom again and this is the kind of treatment I get

I’m hurt

:(

 

**Woozi**

I was just asking

 

**Wall H8-er**

;)

Mhm

;)

 

**Woozi**

You know, Mingyu

You might want to shut your fucking mouth up if you still want to sing in the next album

 

**Wall H8-er**

I can still rap

 

**Woozi**

Oh, really?

 

**Wall H8-er**

…

I apologize

 

**Woozi**

Good.

 

**Seungkwan**

Our powerful Jihoon hyung

My king <3

Anyway

Was I kicked because I called Lee Chan a baby

 

**The Wall God**

Yes you were, glad you realized

However thanks to our Junhui hyung I will let that go

 

**Seungkwan**

Thank you, then

 

**S.Coups**

You kids know that I made this chatroom not for this, don’t you?

 

**Wall H8-er**

Of course we do

But you know hyung

We can use it to have fun too

 

**Dab8**

OH so you like it when we tease you???

 

**Wonwoo**

Oh Mingyu, that is so sweet

 

**Wall H8-er**

Wait no that’s not what I meant

HYUNG HELP

ANYONE

 

**S.Coups**

… You know what

Good night.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mato:  
> Yeah hi guys  
> I write this to relieve stress yes I mentioned it on the tags  
> So I can't really guarantee I can update regularly  
> But I'll try  
> Enjoy <3
> 
>  
> 
> Nyaw:  
> ....  
> well i only pops to edit sometimes and throw random words at her but hi?  
> enjoy tho she works hard and i laugh harder at this ♡


	2. Snack, anyone?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **Hoshi**
> 
>  
> 
> That was not cursing hyung don’t worry!!!
> 
> Fu stands for
> 
> Um
> 
> Fantastic Umbrella
> 
> :D!!!
> 
>  
> 
> **Joshua**
> 
> …
> 
> Just
> 
> Make sure you don’t curse
> 
>  

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Usernames
> 
> S.Coups : S.Coups  
> Jeonghan : Jeonghan  
> Joshua : Joshua  
> Jun : Jun  
> Hoshi : Hoshi  
> Wonwoo : Wonwoo  
> Woozi : Woozi  
> DK : DK  
> Mingyu : Wall H8-er, Meen-Gyoo  
> The8 : Dab8  
> Seungkwan : Seungkwan  
> Vernon : Vernon  
> Dino : The Wall God

**SEVENTEEN (13)**

 

**Woozi**

Anyone up for some snack?

I’m hungry

 

**Hoshi**

What snack

 

**Woozi**

Idk

Street snack? Rice cake?

Anything

 

**Seungkwan**

So you gonna go out

 

**Woozi**

Ya

 

**Seungkwan**

Bring me something back k

Ily hyung

 

**Woozi**

No

 

**Seungkwan**

OH COME ONNN

 

**Woozi**

Whickity whack get your own snack

 

**Wall H8-er**

Lmao

 

**Hoshi**

Lmao don’t laugh at that your name is funnier

 

**Wall H8-er**

Damn it

Would someone pls be so kind as to help change my name

 

**Dab8**

Sure :D

 

**Wall H8-er**

Did not ask for your help

 

**Dab8**

Rude

 

**Wonwoo**

I’ll help

 

**Wall H8-er**

Yes please

Thanks hyung

  


_**Wonwoo** changed **Wall H8-er** ’s username to **Meen-Gyoo** _

  


**Wonwoo**

Anytime

 

**Hoshi**

LMAOOOOO

 

**Meen-Gyoo**

I

Don’t you guys think I’ve suffered enough

 

**Wonwoo**

?

Suffer?

Who made you suffer?

How dare they

 

**Meen-Gyoo**

ALL

OF

YOU???

HYUNGS???

AND DONGSAENGS???

 

**Jeonghan**

So mean :(

 

**The Wall God**

So mean :( seconded

 

**Jun**

More like

So meen :(

 

**Seungkwan**

  


**Hoshi**

  


**The Wall God**

  


**Vernon**

LMAO HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA

 

**Seungkwan**

Tf what was so funny about that

 

**Vernon**

It was funny tho?

No?

 

**Seungkwan**

Whatever I don’t have enough time for this

So Jihoon hyung are you gonna go or not

 

**Woozi**

I don’t wanna grab food alone so depends

Who’s going w me

 

**DK**

I can accompany you hyung!

 

**Woozi**

Thanks Seokmin

That’s one

Anyone else

 

**Hoshi**

Whachu gonna grab

 

**Woozi**

Idk

 

**Hoshi**

O well I’m just gonna tag along

 

**Seungkwan**

“Just gonna tag along”

;)

 

**Hoshi**

Fu :)

 

**Joshua**

Guys pls no cursing

 

**Vernon**

Isn’t it funny how Jisoo hyung is so quiet the whole time

But appears right when someone curses

 

**Joshua**

Someone needs to control you guys

 

**Hoshi**

That was not cursing hyung don’t worry!!!

Fu stands for

Um

Fantastic Umbrella

:D!!!

 

**Joshua**

…

Just

Make sure you don’t curse

 

**Hoshi**

On it hyung!!!

 

**S.Coups**

Jihoon

You remember the thing I told you yesterday?

Buy it for me will ya?

I’ll pay when you get back

 

**Woozi**

K

 

**Seungkwan**

WHAT

ICB

HYUNG YOU REFUSED TO BRING ME SOME SNACK

BUT YOU AGREED TO BUY SEUNGCHEOL HYUNG’S THING???

 

**Woozi**

It’s important

 

**S.Coups**

Besides,

I am currently busy

 

**Seungkwan**

BUT

OH COME ONNN

 

**Woozi**

No

 

**Seungkwan**

Ugh

Top 10 anime betrayals

 

**Woozi**

You’re welcome

That’s it then I’m going

Seokmin Soonyoung let’s go

 

**DK**

Yes hyung~

 

**Seungkwan**

Somebody please

 

**Vernon**

You want me to bring something?

 

**Seungkwan**

Omg

I’m

Touched

He is so kind icb

Hey @Woozi hyung

You see Hansol?

Learn from him, devil

 

**Vernon**

Wow Seungkwan?

 

**Seungkwan**

Yes, baby boo?

 

**Vernon**

Uh

I _can_ bring you food, sure

But you know I can _not_ save you when Jihoon hyung reads that

Yeah?

 

**Seungkwan**

Well

If you die, then you die.

Quoted from Seo Myungho (2017)

Anyway, thanks I appreciate your kindness but rest up it’s fine <3

 

**Vernon**

Actually it’s fine, but ok

 

**Dab8**

Quote by The8™

Thanks for the credit though

SOMEONE definitely should learn from you

 

**Meen-Gyoo**

Well SORRY

The fans credited???

 

**Dab8**

I did not say it was you?

Glad you actually realized

And, yes. They know how to appreciate someone’s effort.

Unlike yoo, Meen-Gyoo

Our Carats are definitely the best!!! :)

 

**Meen-Gyoo**

Would you all _please_ stop attacking me?

Like

Please

And

Stop making puns out of my name smh

 

**Wonwoo**

You acknowledge that Meen-Gyoo is your name?

Thank you for giving in, young man

 

**Meen-Gyoo**

N O

N O O O

THAT’S  N O T WHAT I MEANT

 

**The Wall God**

Awh Mingyu hyung :(

We appreciate your politeness in asking,

However we are also sure™ that you know our answer :(

 

**Jeonghan**

It’s a no, Mingyu :(

 

**Meen-Gyoo**

I know but

You know… It doesn’t hurt to ask

And to try asking for mercy

 

**Joshua**

You know they have no mercy, don’t you?

 

**S.Coups**

… I am surprised that Joshua Hong said that

 

**Joshua**

Sorry, Mingyu… The truth… They do hurt sometimes

 

**Jeonghan**

*all the time

In his case

 

**Jun**

You want mercy?

Try looking for it in a car showroom

 

**Jeonghan**

  


**Meen-Gyoo**

  


**Dab8**

What

 

**Jun**

You know

Mercy

Mercedes? The expensive car? lololol

 

**Meen-Gyoo**

If only the one who said that was not Jun hyung… I would have said boil yourself tq

But since it’s Jun hyung…

Hyung ily wo ai ni but please stop

 

**Wonwoo**

But it was good?

 

**S.Coups**

  


**Jeonghan**

  


**Jun**

At least someone understands

 

**Wonwoo**

Our sense of humor is godly they cannot reach this level of glory

 

**Jun**

Ooh

They rhyme

 

**Wonwoo**

Aye :D

 

**Seungkwan**

???

JEON WONWOO “AYE”-ED???

 

**The Wall God**

Woah…

*slow claps* surprising.

 

**Wonwoo**

Oh come on people. It’s not that odd

 

**S.Coups**

It WAS odd… Wys

Are you okay though…

 

**Jeonghan**

He sounds weirdly high today

Did you burn your books and smoke on them

Do they even make people high?

They’re not made out of weeds

 

**Joshua**

I am having a hard time processing your words, Jeonghan

 

**Jeonghan**

Yeah me too

 

**Joshua**

What?

 

**Jeonghan**

Never mind so Wonwoo are you okay ignore Jisoo

 

**Joshua**

… huh

 

**Wonwoo**

I’m fine, guys. Really.

 

**Jeonghan**

Well okay then let’s leave it at that

 

**Woozi**

Boo Seungkwan you’re dead

 

**Vernon**

Oof

 

**Seungkwan**

oOHHH HIIII HYUUUUUUUUNGG <333

ARE YOU BACK FROM YOUR LITTLE SNACK TRIP???

Or *cough*date*cough*

I’M GLAD YOU’RE BACK SAFE AND SOUND <333

 

**Woozi**

Fake.

Oh did you choke on something Seungkwan?

Choke til you die adios

 

**Joshua**

That was rude…

 

**Woozi**

Well

For starters, I bought him some snacks but he called me

A “devil”

:)

 

**Seungkwan**

You what

 

**Woozi**

Bought you snack?

Yeah, I did.

Well, not exactly yours anymore

Gave it to Seokmin just now

 

**DK**

Thanks for the snack, Seungkwan

 

**Seungkwan**

Wait no my snACK

I APOLOGIZE FORGIVE ME

 

**Woozi**

Not a chance

I’m logging off bye

 

**Seungkwan**

MY SNACK

 

**Hoshi**

He legit put his phone down just now

Laughing like a devil

 

**Jeonghan**

Our cute devil, Jihoon

 

**Seungkwan**

NOT CUTE

 

**The Wall God**

You reap what you sow

:)

 

**Dab8**

:)

 

**Meen-Gyoo**

… that’s it enough mess for today I’m logging off too.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mato:  
> HULLO PEEPS <3  
> I'm glad to see this chatfic is surviving  
> THANKS A LOT FOR READING <3  
> Enjoy enjoy enjoy <3
> 
>  
> 
> Nyaw:  
> lol look at me coming 2 weeks after this thing's updated  
> the perks of being the useless one ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯  
> to be useful there i put all usernames in all chap now  
> to those who are slow like me  
> you're welcome :)


	3. Drunkventeen (pt. 1)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **Wonwoo**  
>  hHiIiilLLllLuuUuUU
> 
>  
> 
> **Meen-Gyoo**  
>   
>   
>  **Hoshi**  
>   
>   
>  **Jun**  
>   
>  I  
>   
> I think we have the answer

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Usernames
> 
> S.Coups : S.Coups  
> Jeonghan : Jeonghan, Angel of Death  
> Joshua : Joshua  
> Jun : Jun  
> Hoshi : Hoshi  
> Wonwoo : Wonwoo, hiLLuU  
> Woozi : [he's not here guess why]  
> DK : DK  
> Mingyu : Meen-Gyoo  
> The8 : Dab8  
> Seungkwan : Seungkwan  
> Vernon : Vernon  
> Dino : The Wall God

**SEVENTEEN (13)**

 

**S.Coups**

Alright.

Tell me, who drank alcohol

 

**Meen-Gyoo**

???

You appeared all of a sudden to ask that?

 

**The Wall God**

What’s so wrong though hyung?

I mean, there’s no minor

So drinking is fine, don’t you think?

 

**Meen-Gyoo**

No longer a minor huh? ;)

 

**The Wall God**

;)

 

**Jeonghan**

Wow you two sure get along well today

What a rare sight

 

**S.Coups**

No no no

Drinking is fine, it is

But I’m sure whoever drank alcohol caused some kind of chaos

I heard crashing sound just now from the bathroom

But when I checked the bathroom there was no one

 

**Dab8**

Crashing sound?

It might just be someone dropping something

Doesn’t have to be drunk

 

**S.Coups**

I also heard rubber duck squeaking and somoene laughing happily

While the crashing sound happened

Tell me it wasn’t someone being drunk

 

**Dab8**

Sorry my bad

Go on

 

**S.Coups**

Okay so WHO drank alcohol

Admit it

 

**Jun**

Not me

 

**Hoshi**

Not me (2)

 

**Wonwoo**

hHiIiilLLllLuuUuUU

 

**Meen-Gyoo**

 

 

**Hoshi**

 

 

**Jun**

I

I think we have the answer

 

**Wonwoo**

WhTTS uUpPP!!1

 

**S.Coups**

Holy lion king

I can’t believe this

 

**Jeonghan**

Rofl

This may be our only chance

I will not miss this chance

 

 

_**Jeonghan** changed **Wonwoo** 's username to **hiLLuU** _

 

 

**Hoshi**

LMAO CAN’T WAIT TIL HE’S SOBER

 

**Meen-Gyoo**

LMAOOO

Anw

Hyung I think we have our criminal

Should we try interrogating him

 

**DK**

Let’s give it a try

Wonwoo hyung

 

**hiLLuU**

YedsdD??

 

**DK**

This is funny already

Did you make a mess in the bathroom earlier?

 

**hiLLuU**

NaAwwW

I wAz juSt HostIng a tALenT shoW!!

Twas amAzeenG

 

**DK**

Talent show

In a bathroom

I am out of words

Someone please interrogate him on my place

I’m retiring

I don’t want to be paid to do this kind of job

 

**Dab8**

One thing I am genuinely curious about is

How Wonwoo hyung manages to press capslock and type like that

I mean

Why is he even pressing the capslock

 

**hiLLuU**

HaYyY im tYpINg liKe hoW peOplE do dez daIs!!

 

**Meen-Gyoo**

Uh

Minghao

You didn’t even bother commenting on how he hosted a talent show in the bathroom?

 

**Dab8**

Welp

 

**hiLLuU**

U guYz shUd haV cOMe!!!!

TeRry wuz da wInnER

He Wad liT

 

**Dab8**

Who is Terry

 

**hiLLuU**

ThIz iS tErrY!!!

 

 

**Meen-Gyoo**

 

**Joshua**

.

I

I just logged on

What sin have I committed to witness this catastrophe

I have so many questions

 

**Jeonghan**

We all do

 

**Dab8**

Wonwoo hyung

Why the bathroom

Why not the kitchen

Why not any other place

Why does it have to be the bathroom

 

**hiLLuU**

Da SounD eCHoeZz

Lyk WhoOm WhoOOM

NaM SAyiNnnN

bAtHROoOm iS dopPE!!

 

**Seungkwan**

Some of my questions include

1.

How did it even fit

2.

HOW DID IT GET THERE AND NOBODY KNEW OF ITS EXISTENCE

 

**S.Coups**

WHAT

I DID NOT SEE ANY GIGANTIC RUBBER DUCK IN THE BATHROOM EARLIER

HOW

HOW THE

JUST HOW DID YOU MANAGE TO TAKE IT OUT THAT FAST

 

**hiLLuU**

AAy hYunGG

ItzA cAllEd mAGIcKk

 

**Seungkwan**

Oh my God

Drunk Wonwoo is magical

 

**hiLLuU**

oH SEUngkWAn

yKno

tErRY SInGs BetTA dAN yU

thNAKS to The ECho

 

**Seungkwan**

Wow I’m offended

He just legit said that a squeaking rubber duck sings better than me

 

**hiLLuU**

Why DunCHA trY siNgIng hERE neXt tIme fo RecorDingg

oR we can HavE tEryR SinG foR us InstRAd Of YuUU

 

**Seungkwan**

Really?

You want a squeaking sound?

In our next album?

Like imagine

ULGO SIPJI ANHA SQUEAK SQUEAK SQUEAK

Or

A SQUEAK KKIN SQUEAK DA SQUEAAAK

Or even worse

EojjeoSQUEAK eojjeoSQUEAK

 

**Meen-Gyoo**

On behalf of Wonwoo hyung,

I am sorry,

He is drunk

And a little bit wild

 

**Jun**

Oh lord

 

**Vernon**

I know he’s drunk

But even if he’s drunk

Are you sure he’s Wonwoo hyung

 

**The Wall God**

… agreed

 

**S.Coups**

So it was HIM

I was right.

Wonwoo who bought you alcohol

 

**hiLLuU**

WdyM!!

I am aN indEpenDEnt AdULt

I dont nEed anYONe to buY sOju fo mE

I cAn buY it mAslef

 

**S.Coups**

So it was soju

 

**Jun**

We all know that Wonwoo will not buy soju and drink it on his own in the dorm

So… what happened that made him drunk in the dorm

 

**Seungkwan**

 

 

**S.Coups**

Seungkwan what’s wrong

 

**Seungkwan**

No

Nothing

Everything’s fine

:)

 

**Jeonghan**

Suspicious

 

**Seungkwan**

No I swear

:)

Just hyungs rmb

Curiosity kills the cat

Y’all better stop trying to know why Wonwoo hyung’s drunk

For your own good

 

**Meen-Gyoo**

Boo Seungkwan knows something: confirmed

 

**S.Coups**

Spill

 

**Seungkwan**

I know nothing

 

**The Wall God**

Liar

 

**Seungkwan**

Shut up fetus

Don’t talk as if u know how the world works

 

**The Wall God**

Wow rly now

U fishy toddler better spill whatever u know now

 

**S.Coups**

Yeah you better tell me what did you do this time that Wonwoo got drunk because of it

 

**Seungkwan**

Me???

What I did???

It’s not my fault Wonwoo hyung drank the soju in the fridge!!!

 

**S.Coups**

What

 

**Seungkwan**

Oops

Well

My argument still stands

It was NOT my fault

 

**Hoshi**

If it were not your fault then why were you super reluctant on spilling the beans

You could have just told us he drank the soju from the fridge u kno

 

**Seungkwan**

Bc

If I told you guys that

I’m like 100% sure y’all gonna say I did it

 

**Jeonghan**

Ouch I can’t believe that’s how you think about us Seungkwan :(

I’m hurt

 

**Seungkwan**

Shut up angel of death

 

**Vernon**

Oof

 

 

_**Hoshi** changed **Jeonghan** ’s username to **Angel of Death** _

 

 

**Angel of Death**

Thx

 

**Hoshi**

Anytime hyungnim <3

 

**S.Coups**

Anyway Seungkwan

What else do you know about the soju Wonwoo drank

 

**Seungkwan**

Promise me you won’t accuse me of being the one who made Wonwoo hyung drank soju

 

**S.Coups**

I won’t

 

**The Wall God**

But I will

 

**Seungkwan**

Shut up zygote

 

**The Wall God**

Welp

 

**Seungkwan**

K so

I was only a witness, in case it is not clear yet

So this morning

I saw Wonwoo hyung opening the fridge

And he took a green bottle

Which looked like a soju bottle

And proceeded to drink

And put the bottle back in the fridge

 

**Joshua**

What

 

**Seungkwan**

IT SOUNDS WEIRD I KNOW

BUT I  S W E A R  IT IS THE TRUTH

IT WAS WHAT I SAW

 

**Hoshi**

Not very convincing to me

 

**Seungkwan**

Oh come on. Really now?

 

**Hoshi**

He’s not dumb

Unlike u

 

**Seungkwan**

Offended™

 

**Jun**

Oh so guys… I think I know why Wonwoo drank the soju

 

**DK**

???

Junhui hyung?

 

**Jun**

Yeah so I checked the bottle Seungkwan said, since he said Wonwoo put it back into the fridge

And apparently the only green bottle in the fridge

Which I am sure is a soju bottle

Does not have any label on it

But someone wrote down “Water” on it

 

**S.Coups**

What the actual heck

 

**Jun**

Oh, my bad

I turned the bottle around and there’s “Alcoholic”

So…

Alcoholic water

 

**Hoshi**

ALCOHOLIC 2ATET BAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAH

LMAO THIS IS SO FUNNY

 

**S.Coups**

Ok now ADMIT IT WHO DID THE ALCOHOLIC WATER SHIT

 

**Joshua**

Oh guys please

 

**S.Coups**

Sorry Jisoo but let this one off pls

We need to find the real culprit

 

**Meen-Gyoo**

Uh

 

**S.Coups**

What is it Mingyu

Do you know something

 

**Meen-Gyoo**

I

Might or might not have

Done it?

 

**S.Coups**

Great.

I don’t know what to say anymore

 

**The Wall God**

Mingyu hyung I know you’re a bit dumb

 

**Meen-Gyoo**

Hey I’m still older than you can’t you be polite

 

**The Wall God**

Well sorry

So

I know you’re a bit…

Hm…

In the lower ranks in terms of intelligence

 

**Dab8**

Lmao

 

**Meen-Gyoo**

I

Fine just go on

 

**The Wall God**

Thanks

But isn’t

Alcoholic water a bit too much even for you

 

**Meen-Gyoo**

I WAS KIND OF TIPSY OKAY

THE ONLY THING I RMB IS

ME

RIPPING THE LABEL OFF

THEN REALIZING THAT SOMEONE MIGHT DRINK THE SOJU IF I JUST LEFT IT IN THE FRIDGE

SO I WANTED TO WRITE SOJU

BUT I FORGOT WHAT IT IS CALLED

THEN MY DRUNK BRAIN JUST WROTE ANYTHING

HENCE ALCOHOLIC WATER

 

**Dab8**

*drunk _dumb_ brain

 

**Meen-Gyoo**

Fuk u

 

**Joshua**

You could at least say Fantastic Umbrella smh

 

**Hoshi**

Lmao

 

**S.Coups**

Gosh

Now where’s Wonwoo

 

**hiLLuU**

HeTrEE

 

**DK**

This is still funny

 

**Vernon**

This will never be not funny wdym

 

 

To be continued... 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mato:  
> HILLU PEEPS  
> Sorry I had to make this chap into 2 parts bcs it's way too long :(  
> And I'm afraid you'll all get bored reading a looong chap  
> The next part will be posted soon (hopefully)  
> Anw thanks for reading <3
> 
> Nyaw:  
> For once i'm not that late  
> praise the Lord and Savior Jisoos  
> This chap is a huge mess since the trigger is that one pic  
> THE ONE DUCK PIC  
> which i found way back before and then forgot about it's existence  
> and leads to me and Mato trying to find it just so she can post this chap -w-  
> But yea rant over, please enjoy the wait for the next chap ♡  
> (pray with me Mato will get her inspiration soon and her real life repsonsibilities are gone)  
> LOVE YA MWA （ʃƪ＾3＾)


	4. Drunkventeen (pt. 2)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **Seungkwan**
> 
>  
> 
> Well I’m a genius
> 
> So
> 
> I just passed the studio
> 
> And I can hear both of them laughing
> 
> At the remix of Hotline Bling and Baby Shark
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
> **Meen-Gyo**
> 
> Hotline Shark
> 
>  
> 
>  
> 
> **The Wall God**
> 
> Why are you the witness of everything

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Usernames
> 
> S.Coups : S.Coups  
> Jeonghan : Angel of Death  
> Joshua : Joshua  
> Jun : Jun  
> Hoshi : Hoshi  
> Wonwoo : hiLLuU  
> Woozi : Woozi, uwuzi, nwnzi  
> DK : DK  
> Mingyu : Meen-Gyoo  
> The8 : Dab8  
> Seungkwan : Seungkwan  
> Vernon : Vernon  
> Dino : The Wall God
> 
> This chapter is a direct continuation from the previous one.. so if you haven't, please read chap 3 first thanks UwU ♡

**S.Coups**

Sigh

Where are you now

 

**hiLLuU**

@ woOzZus sTUdIyo

 

**Joshua**

What

 

**S.Coups**

What

 

**Vernon**

What

 

**DK**

What

 

**Meen-Gyoo**

How the heck did he get there

 

**Dab8**

First he brought a giant rubber duck in without anyone knowing

And managed to somehow remove the Terry big duck thing without anyone knowing

And now he left the dorm and went to Jihoon hyung’s studio SAFELY in a drunk state

AND ONCE AGAIN NOBODY KNOWS ANYTHING

Drunk Wonwoo is indeed magical

 

**Seungkwan**

Hyung regarding Wonwoo hyung’s presence in Jihoon hyung’s studio

I think something bad has happened

 

**S.Coups**

What why

 

**Seungkwan**

So you all know I went to the Pledis building earlier right

Before any of you asks, no I did not notice Wonwoo hyung coming

 

**Vernon**

I was just about to ask how did you know

 

**Seungkwan**

Well I’m a genius

So

I just passed the studio

And I can hear both of them laughing

At the remix of Hotline Bling and Baby Shark

 

**Meen-Gyo**

Hotline Shark

 

**The Wall God**

Why are you the witness of everything

 

**Seungkwan**

Cuz I'm always at the right place at the right time

Making me the most righteous person

 

**Joshua**

I'm sure that's not how it works but sure go on

 

**S.Coups**

… don’t tell me he’s drunk too

 

**Hoshi**

Wait this is gonna be fun

Hey Wonwoo

Ask Jihoon to log in will you?

 

**The Wall God**

Ooh

Fun

 

**hiLLuU**

OkI

 

**Hoshi**

And now we wait

 

**Woozi**

Hello guys

 

**Dab8**

No fun he looks normal

 

**Seungkwan**

Hyung did I hear it wrong or did you just remix Hotline Bling and Baby Shark

 

**Woozi**

Oh yeah I did

It was a masterpiece

Oh and also

I made a song for you guys

 

**Hoshi**

You made a what

 

**Woozi**

Song for you guys

uwu

 

**Meen-Gyoo**

ShRIEKS

 

**DK**

CREEPIER THAN ANY HORROR MOVIE EVER

 

**Dab8**

Oops sorry he’s not normal

 

**Vernon**

Did he just

 

**Hoshi**

HE UWU-ED?????????????

HE IS DEFINITELY ABSOLUTELY UNDOUBTEDLY DRUNK

 

**Angel of Death**

Screenshotted

 

_**Seungkwan** changed **Woozi** ’s username to **uwuzi** _

 

**Hoshi**

You’re really not afraid of death aren’t ya

 

**Seungkwan**

Yolo

¯\\_(ツ)_/¯

 

**uwuzi**

Thank you Seungkwan uwu

 

**Seungkwan**

He

He thanked me I really am gonna die goodbye hyungs goodbye Hansol goodbye Chan it has been nice meeting you all ily I’ll see y’all in the afterlife

 

**Jun**

That took an unexpected turn

 

**S.Coups**

Jihoon are you drunk

 

**uwuzi**

No?

 

**Angel of Death**

Highly debatable

 

**Hoshi**

Then let’s check

Jihoon, I love you! (ノ◕ヮ◕)ノ✧˖°.*

 

**uwuzi**

Aw I love you too Soonyoung! uwu

 

**Hoshi**

I have mixed feelings

 

**DK**

I thought you’d be happy

 

**Hoshi**

I am but it’s scary at the same time

But that aside, Jihoon is drunk: confirmed

 

**S.Coups**

Alright what the heck did you drink

 

**uwuzi**

Wonwoo gave me something nice!

With ju ju on the name

Juju on that beat

Aye

 

**Dab8**

He even brought soju with him I’m so done

 

**hiLLuU**

I ShoVeD SOjU dowN hiS thROAt

Oh ANd AlsO

woOZi AgrEEd on inLCudIng tErRy on Iur nExt AlBuUUmM

 

**Seungkwan**

HE WHAT

Oh right he’s drunk

 

**Meen-Gyoo**

Be glad, at least he did not say yes to recording in the bathroom

 

**hiLLuU**

OohHhHHHHh yUh ThAT

hE AlSo SAid tHAT iSt a GuD IDeA

 

**Meen-Gyoo**

Nevermind

 

**Seungkwan**

Someone please tie them up

 

**S.Coups**

…

I

Am coming to get them

 

**The Wall God**

Seungcheol hyung saves the day!!!

 

**Vernon**

Praise Seungcheol hyung

 

**S.Coups**

We’re gonna have a talk concerning drinking in the dorm after I get back

I’m going now you’re all dismissed

 

**Hoshi**

Bye hyung

 

**Seungkwan**

Get back safe hyung

 

**Jun**

Be careful on your way

 

**hiLLuU**

CyA ChEOl

 

**Joshua**

… these kids are amazing…

 

**Angel of Death**

Tell me about it

Oh Woozi, you made a song for us?

 

**uwuzi**

Yes!

 

**Seungkwan**

Is it about destroying us or something

 

**uwuzi**

Nooo

I made it to show how much I love you guys nwn

 

**Hoshi**

 

**DK**

 

**The Wall God**

 

**Seungkwan**

Wow

Yeah

nwn huh

Sure buddy

Nothing weird

 

**Vernon**

Wow how do we even read nwn

 

**Meen-Gyoo**

Hansol wth

 

**Vernon**

No but guys look

You can literally read uwu out loud like it’s literally oo-woo when you say it

But how do you read nwn

Is it en-wen?

 

**Dab8**

It’s not even the problem here lord have mercy on me

 

**Jun**

I told you, you can find it in the car sh

 

**Meen-Gyoo**

Why is his message cut

 

**Dab8**

I threw nunchucks to his phone

I don’t want to read that dubious joke again

 

**Meen-Gyoo**

… oh

Yeah classic Xu Minghao stuff

 

**Seungkwan**

Well since I have the chance

 

_**Seungkwan** changed **uwuzi** ’s name to **nwnzi** _

 

**Vernon**

See? How do you read that

 

**Seungkwan**

Shut up Hansol

 

**Vernon**

Well k

 

**hiLLuU**

Hey this is Seungcheol

I’ve got thEjJHKJuHSOIYUB0v

hELLlpppppppJFjkhsdhioyAUBSLHaslj

I’m heading home now

 

**Joshua**

What happened

 

**Jun**

Uh

Jihoon what happened

 

**nwnzi**

Nothing!

They are just fighting over Wonwoo’s phone

 

**Joshua**

How is that nothing

 

**nwnzi**

Guys help Seungcheol is dragging me D:

 

**Seungkwan**

See you hyung

 

**Hoshi**

And now we wait (2)

 

**DK**

Can you imagine what’d happen when they’re sober

 

**The Wall God**

Oooh

More fun

 

**Seungkwan**

And a dead body

 

**Jun**

Whose?

 

**Seungkwan**

Mine obviously ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯

 

**The Wall God**

Bye :D

 

**Seungkwan**

:)

Fuc

I mean

Fantastic Umbrella :)

 

**Joshua**

Good :)

 

**Meen-Gyoo**

Hey I’m hungry let’s grab some food

Anyone

 

**Seungkwan**

I’m in

 

**The Wall God**

Me too

Hansol hyung said he’s in too

 

**Angel of Death**

I’m gonna sleep and rest here with Jisoo

 

**Dab8**

Junhui hyung said he needs to repair his phone screen

It cracked

Strange

I was with him the whole time

How did that happen?

Anyway

I’m gonna go with him

 

**Meen-Gyoo**

Yeah sure Minghao

 

**Joshua**

Yeah well you guys go

We’ll tell Seungcheol

The talk can be done later

 

**Meen-Gyoo**

Thanks hyung

See ya when they’re sober!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mato:  
> HI HAHAHAHAHAHA  
> A QUICK (is it quick enough) UPDATE FOR THE 2ND PART  
> BUT well I'm sorry to inform you that after this one the next updates will  
> take  
> a  
> looong  
> time  
> since I'm getting busy with life  
> I'm very thankful if u r all willing to wait tho :')  
> Anw enjoyyy <3
> 
>  
> 
> Nyaw:  
> You know how it feels to be her co-creator?  
> We were just chatting normally and suddenly she's like,  
> "sis, u have your lappy? i'm updating now"  
> I  
> AM  
> NOT  
> PREPARED  
> but yea she left me today and i'm bored :<  
> someone come play with me :<  
> ps: Hao @ Jun with nunchucks is like me @ Mato whenever she throws dad jokes at me smh


	5. The aftermath & A new unit?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **Vernon**  
>  Um listen I’m just curious  
> But Wonwoo hyung
> 
>  **hiLLuU**  
>  Yes?
> 
>  **Vernon**  
>  Where is Terry

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> We're sorry this took too long but if you need explanation I'll put it on the end note.  
> Enjoy loves ♡
> 
>  
> 
> Usernames
> 
> S.Coups : S.Coups  
> Jeonghan : Angel of Death  
> Joshua : Joshua  
> Jun : Jun, Proton  
> Hoshi : Hoshi  
> Wonwoo : hiLLuU  
> Woozi : nwnzi, uwuzi, owozi  
> DK : DK  
> Mingyu : Meen-Gyoo, Electron  
> The8 : Dab8  
> Seungkwan : Seungkwan  
> Vernon : Vernon, Neutron  
> Dino : The Wall God, Lt. Dino, Lt. Stegosaurus

**SEVENTEEN (13)**

 

 **Meen-Gyoo**  
HILLU nwnzi  
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHA  
LMAOOOOOOO

 **hiLLuU**  
Shut up, Mingyu

 **nwnzi**  
Oh shut tf up Mingyu

 **Meen-Gyoo**  
No hyung u were too cute to be true  
It’s like a once in a lifetime experience to see u being that cute  
And Wonwoo hyung was so  
So  
So magical

 **hiLLuU**  
I’ll take that as a compliment even though I don’t really like it

 **nwnzi**  
Yeah I was drunk shut it

 **Hoshi**  
Wow chill Jihoon no need to be mad

 **nwnzi**  
If Mingyu hadn’t written alcoholic water on that bottle this wouldn’t have fucking happened

 **Joshua**  
… please

 **nwnzi**  
Just today pls hyung  
Tomorrow I’ll stop

 **Meen-Gyoo**  
But I wasn’t the one who chugged that soju down ur throat…

 **nwnzi**  
If u hadn’t done the alcoholic h2o stuff Wonwoo wouldn’t have been drunk  
Then he wouldn’t have brought a bottle of soju to my studio  
And I wouldn’t have made a mashup of Hotline Shark and Baby Bling  
Fck I mean Hotline Bling and Baby Shark

 **Hoshi**  
Are you still drunk

 **nwnzi**  
Am not dw  
And NONE OF THESE would have actually happened tq

 **Meen-Gyoo**  
… fine sorry  
I apologize

 **S.Coups**  
Let it go Jihoon  
What’s done is done anyway

 **nwnzi**  
Ya

 **Vernon**  
Um listen I’m just curious  
But Wonwoo hyung

 **hiLLuU**  
Yes?

 **Vernon**  
Where is Terry

 **hiLLuU**  
Sorry but I really have no idea where it is

 **Seungkwan**  
Magical Jeon Wonwoo™

 **hiLLuU**  
I admit my drunk state is quite magical mhm  
And it was soju too

 **S.Coups**  
Hansol  
You ARE just curious right  
Nothing more  
Right?

 **Vernon**  
Uh  
Yes

 **S.Coups**  
No thoughts on bringing that duck back to the dorm  
Right?

 **Vernon**  
Uhhh  
Uh  
Yeah

 **Seungkwan**  
Don’t lie

 **Vernon**  
Well yeah I HAD thought about it but not anymore

 **S.Coups**  
Please remember what I said earlier at the dorm meeting regarding alcohol and being drunk  
That no one  
And by no one I mean NO one  
Is allowed to bring a rubber duck into this dorm  
Especially not the giant one  
Especially not Terry  
Did I make that clear?

 **Vernon**  
Crystal, sir

 **S.Coups**  
Good

 **Angel of Death**  
Seungcheol what about a giant giraffe?

 **S.Coups**  
You resemble a giraffe enough we don’t need any more giraffes

 **Angel of Death**  
But I need a giraffe friend

 **S.Coups**  
Imma send you to a zoo

 **Meen-Gyoo**  
Yikes

 **Angel of Death**  
Wow no thanks

 **S.Coups**  
Yeah that sounds better

 **Hoshi**  
But hey guys  
I really find Wonwoo’s ability in bringing Terry into and out from the dorm is interesting  
And when he went from the dorm to Jihoon’s studio without anyone knowing

 **hiLLuU**  
*drunk Wonwoo

 **Hoshi**  
Yh sure  
Like  
Isn’t it that one ability  
Which you can go from one space to another in only a second

 **Meen-Gyoo**  
Oh yeah

 **Hoshi**  
What was the name again

 **Meen-Gyoo**  
Transportation

 **Hoshi**  
Yeah that!  
Wait something sounds weird r u sure that’s what it’s called

 **Dab8**  
It’s teleportation dumbass @Meen-Gyoo

 **Hoshi**  
YEAH THAT’S THE ONE

 **Meen-Gyoo**  
STOP BULLYING ME

 **The Wall God**  
No can do hyung  
Way too much fun to stop

 **Meen-Gyoo**  
I hate you so much

 **The Wall God**  
I love you too  <3

 **Jun**  
Good. Fight negativity with positivity!  
Be like Chan, everyone

 **DK**  
Lol Junhui hyung is finally joining the squad

 **The Wall God**  
12 vs 1 whoop

 **Vernon**  
Wait I’m neutral

 **S.Coups**  
I was never involved in any of your fights either

 **The Wall God**  
Being neutral means siding with the majority, hyungs

 **Vernon**  
What?  
That’s not how it works

 **S.Coups**  
That’s not how it works indeed

 **Angel of Death**  
Follow the rules made by Chan, the superior one here, lowly civilians

 **Hoshi**  
All of us here are obliged to obey Lieutenant Chan’s orders  
Aside from Mingyu  
That traitor.

 **Meen-Gyoo**  
WHY AM I A TRAITOR SUDDENLY????

 **The Wall God**  
And why am I a lieutenant

 **Angel of Death**  
Because you’re the leader

 

_**Hoshi** changed **The Wall God** ’s name to **Lt. Dino**_

 

 **Lt. Dino**  
Srsly?

 **hiLLuU**  
You don’t like it?

 **Lt. Dino**  
It sounds childish

 **hiLLuU**  
I’m going to make it sound cooler

 **Lt. Dino**  
I’ve got a bad feeling about this

 

_**hiLLuU** changed **Lt. Dino** ’s name to **Lt. Stegosaurus**_

 

 **Lt. Stegosaurus**  
Yup.

 **DK**  
LOL

 **Joshua**  
That was actually quite funny

 **Lt. Stegosaurus**  
Wow Jisoo hyung laughed okay then  
The name’s accepted for the sake of Jisoo hyung’s laughter

 **Joshua**  
I’m touched

 **Angel of Death**  
Lieutenant, why are you only kind to Jisoo :(

 **Lt. Stegosaurus**  
Because he’s the only one who’s kind and sincere

 **Jun**  
But we all love you Chan! :(

 **Lt. Stegosaurus**  
… fine

 **DK**  
One sentence from Junhui hyung and Chan is down

 **hiLLuU**  
It’s amazing how Junhui’s positivity can always convince Chan  
He’s so positive I thought he’s a proton

 **nwnzi**  
What the fuck

 **Joshua**  
Jihoon please

 **nwnzi**  
Oh come on hyung I promised it’s only for today

 **Joshua**  
Sigh, fine

 **hiLLuU**  
Let me live, Jihoon

 

_**hiLLuU** changed **Jun** ’s name to **Proton**_

 

 **hiLLuU**  
And since he’s fighting the negativity which is the electron

 

_**hiLLuU** changed **Meen-Gyoo** ’s name to **electron**_

 

 **electron**  
NOT ME AGAIN OG WTF  
WHY AM I THE NEGATIVITY

 **hiLLuU**  
Sorry Mingyu I had to

 **Proton**  
Say what about Hansol?  
He’s been saying he’s neutral for awhile

 **Vernon**  
Am I going to be dragged into this name chaos

 **hiLLuU**  
Right

 

_**hiLLuU** changed **Vernon** ’s name to **Neutron**_

 

 **Neutron**  
…

 **Proton**  
We should make a unit!!!  
The atom unit!!!

 **electron**  
… no please no…

 **nwnzi**  
Yeah while you’re all in this name changing shit  
Would anyone please change my name

 **Hoshi**  
Sure!

 **nwnzi**  
No please not you

 

_**Hoshi** changed **nwnzi** ’s name to **uwuzi**_

 

 **Hoshi**  
Too late

 **uwuzi**  
U wanna die?

 **hiLLuU**  
Yes  
I want to  
Please

 **uwuzi**  
… not you

 **Hoshi**  
You hate it?  
Fine wait up

 **uwuzi**  
No don’t touch my name

 

_**Hoshi** changed **uwuzi** ’s name to **owozi**_

 

 **Hoshi**  
Oops

 **owozi**  
That’s it you’re dead

 **Dab8**  
Oof

 **Hoshi**  
Oh you don’t like that one too?  
Fine then how about oowoozi?  
It’s got your name in it  
ooWOOZI  
Right? Right?

 **Joshua**  
In memoriam of Kwon Soonyoung  
He’s not dead  
But he’s facing death and is still looking for more death

 **DK**  
He’s a good guy… He’s just a little bit dumb

 **Seungkwan**  
And a bit too brave for a bit dumb person

 **Hoshi**  
Guys wtf? I’m not dumb nor dying?

 **Joshua**  
What is it this time  
You’re not gonna say it’s what the fantastic, right?

 **Hoshi**  
Well…  
It’s…  
Wavy thick farfalle

 **electron**  
Ooh wavy and thicc

 **Seungkwan**  
Pervert

 **S.Coups**  
Pervert

 **Angel of Death**  
Pervert

 **Dab8**  
Pervert

 **Lt. Stegosaurus**  
Even a pervert towards pasta, what a huge pervert

 **electron**  
Wow  
If the one who had said that weren’t me this wouldn’t have happened  
Why am I Mingyu

 **DK**  
Because you were born as a Kim Mingyu

 **Neutron**  
^

 **electron**  
Shut up you two I know that much

 **Neutron**  
Then why did you still bother to ask

 **electron**  
See  
You being a neutron is such a huge fat lie

 **Neutron**  
While you being an electron is a huge fat fact hyung

 **electron**  
Ihu

 **Neutron**  
¯\\_(ツ)_/¯

 **hiLLuU**  
Amongst all these bad things happening to you, Mingyu…  
I have to be thankful for one thing

 **electron**  
Oh  
I’m touched  
Why?

 **hiLLuU**  
Thanks to you being bullied  
Everyone has forgotten about me and Jihoon  
So  
Thank you

 **owozi**  
Wait I’ve got a bad feeling about this

 **Dab8**  
Oooooooooh thanks hyung for reminding me

 **Seungkwan**  
Now my memory is refreshed!!!

 **Angel of Death**  
So should we talk about that song Jihoon made for us???

 **Lt. Stegosaurus**  
Nice idea!!! What kind of song was it hyung???

 **owozi**  
Well…  
Fuck.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Nyaw:  
> So...  
> This was written in Sep.. but now Mato is a freshman at uni and she doesn't has much freetime (which means i'm a lonely potato) and i got work now (yay?)  
> Updates might be slower from now on unless Mato got long holiday cause i suck at writing long chap.. But when it's in desperate need i might write some and sorry in advance for the quality lol
> 
> Please give Mato some encouragement and WE LOVE YOU SO MUCH HAVE A GOOD DAY ♡
> 
>  
> 
> Mato:  
> WHY HELLO PEOPLE SORRY THIS TAKES SO LONG :(  
> Didn't expect uni life to be this hectic, I practically had no time to write fics :(  
> Glad Nyaw actually told me she'll be updating this chap so we at least have one chap to upload  
> Anw enjoy <3 I'll be doing my best to write more uwu


	6. Poor Wonwoo

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> **Proton**  
>  WONWOO YOU’RE A NERD!
> 
>  **Dab8**  
>  YEAH A BIGASS BOOKWORM!
> 
>  **hiLLuU**  
>  What

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Usernames
> 
> S.Coups : S.Coups  
> Jeonghan : Jeonghan, Angel of Death  
> Joshua : Joshua  
> Jun : Jun, Proton  
> Hoshi : Hoshi, Shut Up  
> Wonwoo : Wonwoo, hiLLuU  
> Woozi : Woozi, owozi  
> DK : DK  
> Mingyu : Mingyu  
> The8 : The8, Dab8  
> Seungkwan : Seungkwan  
> Vernon : Vernon, Neutron  
> Dino : Dino, Lt. Stegosaurus

**_Dino_ ** _created a new chatroom_

 **_Dino_ ** _added_ **_S.Coups_** _,_ ** _Jeonghan_ ** _and_ **_8 other users_ **

**_Dino_ ** _renamed the chatroom to_ **_JunHao Drama?_ **

  


**JunHao Drama? (11)**

 

**Dino**

Ahh it feels great to see my username back to normal

I love new chatrooms

Anyway

Is it just me or Junhui and Myungho hyungs are rly shouting at each other rn?

 

**Jeonghan**

Well

They are

I guess we should try splitting them into 2 rooms

 

**Vernon**

They are but why don't I understand them

 

**Woozi**

They're shouting in Chinese dumbass

 

**Joshua**

I thought the conventional way is to lock them in the same room?

 

**Jeonghan**

Please remember that they are both masters in martial arts

Who knows what will happen if they're together in the same room

Catastrophe

 

**Joshua**

Point taken

 

**S.Coups**

Too late, guys

I heard some nunchucks sound and glass breaking sound

… and another glass breaking sound

 

**Mingyu**

GET MOVING BEFORE THEY BREAK MORE TF HYUNGS???

 

**DK**

Okay Mingyu is off to pull Myungho to his bedroom

Seungcheol hyung, he said please drag Junhui hyung to somewhere else

 

**S.Coups**

Sigh I didn't sign up for this

I'll put him in 95 liners’ room

 

**Woozi**

Okay while they do their job

Tf is JunHao? You forgot to put space there Chan?

 

**Joshua**

… Jihoon…

 

**Woozi**

Oh

Sorry hyung it just slipped

 

**Wonwoo**

Jihoon, you don't know ship names?

 

**Woozi**

No?

I'm not becoming a sailor why do i need to know ship names?

 

**Seungkwan**

No hyung not that ship

It's shipping

 

**Woozi**

??? What are you gonna send?

 

**Wonwoo**

Shipping is when you take 2 people or characters and imagine they're in a relationship

 

**Woozi**

Uhh… okay so JunHao is Junhui and Minghao?

 

**Hoshi**

Yes, Jihoonie!

There's also JeongCheol, VerKwan and SoonHoon or SoonSeok in Carat's mentions

We’re together uwu

 

**Woozi**

Yeah gross

 

**Hoshi**

Aw rude :(

I think the one for Wonwoo and Mingyu is MinWon?

 

**Wonwoo**

No it's Meanie

It's from Mingyu and Mr. Beanie, my nickname back in Seventeen TV. They've been shipping us since our predebut era and they didn't change our ship name even though I went by Wonwoo in the end

 

**Woozi**

…

 

**Seungkwan**

…

 

**Joshua**

…

 

**Jeonghan**

I'll be the one to ask

And why do you know this so well, Wonwoo?

Care to explain?

 

 

 **_Wonwoo_ ** _left the chat_

 

 

**Seungkwan**

Oh no he won't run

 

**Mingyu**

Wow we went to risk our lives separating Junhui hyung and Myungho and you guys are talking about totally irrelevant unimportant things

 

**Hoshi**

Wow good thing Wonwoo left

His pair just said their pair is irrelevant

 

 

_**Mingyu** changed  **Hoshi** 's name to  **Shut Up**_

 

 

**Woozi**

Nice

I like it

 

**Shut Up**

Is this a revenge for your past username

 

**Mingyu**

¯\\_(ツ)_/¯

 

**S.Coups**

Not to be dramatic but yeah we risked our lives

I think I have a couple bruises now

 

**Joshua**

Thanks for the effort guys

 

**Jeonghan**

Wow they managed to land a few bruises on the body of the Choi Seungcheol

But hey

They're still screaming though

 

**Woozi**

Fine, that's it.

 

**Shut Up**

?

What?

 

**Dino**

… Wow Jihoon hyung really is scary when he's pissed

 

**Vernon**

Lmao they stopped shouting right after Jihoon hyung yelled at them

 

**DK**

Tbh I'll be pissing my pants if he shouts at me like that…

His shout echoed throughout our building

 

**Woozi**

:)

Now we wait in peace

 

\- - - - -

 

 ** _Jeonghan_** _created a new chatroom_

 **_Jeonghan_ ** _added_ **_Jun_ ** _and_ **_The8_ **

 

 

**Jeonghan, Jun, The8 (3)**

 

**Jeonghan**

Okay, you two

Now that Jihoon has shouted at the both of you, I can be quite sure that you won’t shout at each other for the time being

 

**Jun**

Yes

 

**The8**

I still value my life, so yes

 

**Jeonghan**

Good

But you need to sort things out, okay

I don’t want whatever is making you two fight to interfere with our work

Talk to each other here and make sure you two are fine at the end of the day

Understood?

 

**Jun**

Yes, sir

 

**The8**

Yes, sir

 

**Jeonghan**

Oh one more thing

I want both of you to refrain from using Chinese here in this chatroom

Talk in Korean only

Okay?

 

**Jun**

?

Why?

 

**Jeonghan**

Just do it

 

**Jun**

Well okay

 

**Jeonghan**

Good

I’m leaving then

Violate the rule I gave you and Jihoon will face you two again

To make sure you two remember the rule

 

 

 **_Jeonghan_ ** _renamed the chatroom to_ **_Korean is Dangerous_ **

**_Jeonghan_ ** _left the chat_

 

 

**Korean is Dangerous (2)**

 

**The8**

Glad I don't have to see your face

 

**Jun**

Don't even text me ugh

 

**The8**

I don’t even want to

But we need to settle this for once and for all

You read what Jeonghan hyung said

 

**Jun**

Fine just don't forget that one rule Jeonghan hyung gave us

 

**The8**

Yes wtf I'm not dumb ofc I remember that I have to use Korean

 

**Jun**

Why can't we just use Chinese though smh

 

**The8**

Not important.

So now you hear me out.

YOU WERE THE ONE WHO WAS SO-

SO-

Ugh what was it again

Think think think

SO SELFISH AND TOLD ME TO NOT TOUCH YOUR BAG

IT WAS ONLY A BAG WHAT THE HELL???

 

**Jun**

HA

LOOK AT YOU STUTTERING IN KOREAN. STILL A BEGINNER AREN'T YA???

 

**The8**

SHUT UP

 

**Jun**

WELL YOU DID THAT WITHOUT ANY NOTICE

I BELIEVE THAT I'VE TOLD YOU WAY BACK NOT TO TOUCH THAT BAG

YET YOU WERE

UH

Um

Hmm

Reluctant

No that's not it

BEING CHILDISH BY NOT LISTENING TO MY WORDS.

 

**The8**

SEE

YOU'RE STUTTERING TOO

JUST BCS YOU HAVE LIVED LONGER IN KOREA DOESN'T MEAN YOU ARE BETTER THAN ME

 

**Jun**

YEAH? AT LEAST I KNOW MORE WORDS THAN YOU DO

 

**The8**

EXCUSE ME I READ BOOKS ON A DAILY BASIS OFC I WIN IN TERMS OF VOCABULARY

 

**Jun**

NERD

 

**The8**

SAY THAT AGAIN???

 

**Jun**

BOOKWORM

 

**The8**

SAY THAT TO WONWOO HYUNG NOT ME!  


 

 

**SEVENTEEN (13)**

 

**Proton**

WONWOO YOU’RE A NERD!

 

**Dab8**

YEAH A BIGASS BOOKWORM!

 

**hiLLuU**

What

I didn't even do anything?

 

**Angel of Death**

Oh

About time they made up, don't you think?

 

**owozi**

They went dead silent after we separate them and suddenly they're roasting Wonwoo together

Big mood

 

**Hoshi**

More like after you yelled at them but yeah accepted

 

**Dab8**

SHUT YOU GUYS DON'T KNOW SHIT

 

**Proton**

YEAH YOU GUYS SUCK

NICE BACK UP THERE

 

**Dab8**

WELL T’WAS NEEDED

 

**owozi**

Heck

Why am I dissed too

Go back to your argument or whatever it is

Come back when you're both done

 

**Dab8**

… hahaha

About that

I kind of forgot why we were fighting honestly

 

**Proton**

Welp

Me too tbh

Now I know why Jeonghan hyung said we should use Korean

 

**Dab8**

Yup I don't even remember what we were fighting on

 

**S.Coups**

… at least now we know what to do when JunHao fight with each other

 

**DK**

Look at the bright side :D

 

**owozi**

If that means I'd have to be cursed by them then I'd rather not thanks

 

**Joshua**

Sometimes we have to sacrifice ourselves for the greater good, Jihoon

 

**owozi**

Well

Fuck

 

**Seungkwan**

You're doomed hyung, Joshua hyung has spoken

Anyway

Since the JunHao drama is over

Wonwoo hyung you owe us an explanation :)

 

**Hoshi**

Oh right :)

 

**DK**

Exciting :)

 

**Proton**

Huh? About what?

 

**Neutron**

Oh that

 

**Lt. Stegosaurus**

Well

You’ll see, hyung

 

**hiLLuU**

:)

 

  
**_hiLLuU_ ** _left the chat_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mato:  
> WAZZAAAAA  
> Hi sorry for a month of no update  
> I'm stress-less nowadays so I have nothing to write but hEY  
> I'm still weird af so ofc I'll come up with something soon  
> AND I'VE ONLY FOUND OUT WE'RE OVER 1K HITS ALREADY OMG THANKSSS <3  
> ILY uwu
> 
> Nyaw:  
> AYO WADDUP KIDS  
> IT'S BEEN A YEAR HAHAHA  
> you read this you know my humor suck, deal with it ¯\\_(ツ)_/¯  
> Mato's less stressed lately i guess so i'll spam her with stupid ideas  
> i hope that'll induce some chap cause i'm waiting just as you are -w-  
> CIAO UwU


End file.
